一个瑞典女孩在上海的约会经历（zt)
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Actually it is not me but a Swedish girl named Meredith.
The many many men
By Dee
China is becoming a very international place. Interesting people from all around the world flock here to be a part of the transformation, seize new opportunities, experince a different culture but also to have fun! So being young, single and new to Shanghai seemed like the perfect opportunity to do some dating to see what kind of guys you can actually meet here. So I went shopping and got a pair of new strappy sandals and extremely flattering designer jeans. This is a summery of my dates and what I learned when dating in China.
Where: A bar
Who:the Pilot
I was with my girl friend sipping strong Margaritas as He approached me; blonde, tanned and muscular. How could I not talk to him? He was infectious; charming, funny, smart and well traveled and oh-so-smooth with the ladies. After chatting for a few hours I had fallen for his charm and mentioning that he was a pilot did have a certain impact too I must admit. Men in uniforms are hot! Plus he kept telling me so many interesting stories which were truly entertaining. So the next day I agreed to give him a tour of the city. He was annoyingly perfect to be real honest. He was funny yet a gentleman and so far I saw no flaws. After dinner at a trendy restaurant he took out his wallet to pay and there it was... The picture! My body sort of froze for a sec and my eyes were fixed on the cute brunette with one kid on her arm and a young girl standing next to her. They all resembled the charming pilot I was having a very romantic dinner with too much. He noticed; I noticed and there was no way he could get out of this. A lame lie would not work. He told the truth "Yes I am married ...but that doesn't mean I cant see you too. I fly here once a week" WHAT IS HE ON ABOUT?! Cheating to me is a 'big big no no'. I just feel sorry for the poor wify back home, I don't want to know how many girls he has different cities that he wines and dines on weekly basis when he flies in. I just know I don't ever want to become one of them.
Lesson learned : Assuming that a man is single when you go on a date was obviously too much to ask for. So thus I have learnt a girl has to check for rings ASAP and if you have the chance glance at his wallet, do so. Picture of beautiful ladies with smiling babies is a big warning sign. RUN! No one wants to be the other woman.
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[ 本帖最后由 izzie 于 2006-2-25 22:46 编辑 ] Where: University campus
Who: tall Chinese architect student
My university campus is enormous. I mean, it is huge! It is like a little world of its own when I think about it. It has lots of roads, buildings, a small forrest, supermarkets, coffee shops, gardens, sports fields and a lake. So there I was at the wrong side of the campus and after looking at the map I realized it would be quite the walk to get to the foreign students office. I spotted a tall cute guy and asked him just to double check that the students office was really in that direction. He nodded and say yes and I thanked him and started my long walk. After just a few meters I heard someone shouting after me "Miss, Miss, I can give you a ride". I looked back and realized he was on a bike. So I climbed on to the back of his bike and off we went. I had to hold on to him tight as he was quite the fast biker. I remember thinking; "Wheee! This was fun! And it feels really 'Chinese'. I have to make a mental note of getting my own bike. I simply must". Hugging him I learnt a few things about this kind stranger. He was local Shangahinese, 25 years old, doing a masters degree in architecture, a basketball player and desperately needed someone to practise English with. So after he dropped me off at the students office we swooped numbers and decided to meet the following day at the coffee shop. Moments later I got a sms saying "Hi pretty girl. It was very nice to meet you". We did indeed meet. Coffee turned into a long walk, a long walk turned into dinner at a funky noodle bar and afterwards he asked if I wanted to come to his house and have a cup of tea. I agreed and we went left the university campus and walked to a block of apartments. I suddenly struck me that he never told me how he lives. "Maybe he has room mates or his own place? Or stay with his parents? This will be interesting", I though to myself. As we walked through the door the smell of spicy food hit me, I heard the sounds of Chinese pop music and the voices of older people. When I entered the living room there was a whole family there. Some children watched tv, the old people read the paper, the father in the family was working on the computer.... I was introduced to all of them and someone pulled me a chair. My new found friends mother came with a pot of hot sweet tea and I slowly drank it trying to take it all it. They were all speaking Chinese, looking at me, trying to communticte, asking questions and the little girl played with my blonde hair and tried to make a pony tail. Time was running late and I thank them and left. Me and the architect students said bye and as he leaned into kiss me I whispered "I think we should be friends". Not because of the family simply because that was all I felt for him.
Lesson learned: It is possible, fun and interesting to date people from other cultures. Its just that you have to bare in mind that He comes with his mom, grandma, aunt, baby sister and ayi. Coming from a country where privacy, independence and space is highly cherished having the whole family so close to you was for me strange. But if you like someone iIsee no reason why it couldn't work.
----------- Where: The supermarket
Who: The American general manager for some big company (which I forgot the name of)
So there I was on my tip toes reaching up for the extremely overprice imported blue berry cereals at trendy downtown supermarket as a I heard a deep voice behind me "Do you need some help?". I twirled around and in front of me was a tall, tanned guy in a business suit. His name was Alex and after chatting 15 min in the supermarket aisle he got my number and we had dinner plans the following Friday.
A week later I was meeting some girlfriends to catch up when an uncomfortable feeling of deja vu hit me as one of the girls started talking about this man she had been on a date with. It all sounded strangely familiar as she recalled where they went, what they ate and even things he said. After a while I couldn't keep it to myself I had to ask her; could it possibly be the same guy I was seeing?!And well, turn out 'its a small world after all...its a small small world'. We had both been dating the same guy! He had told the same sappy stories, sent us the same types of flowers with the same poem, ordered the same dishes and the list goes on... just days a part! At this point neither of us were falling for him so no one got hurt. But it left me feeling a little jaded. No one wants to feel like you are just part of a pattern , a working routine.
Lesson learned : That one can not expect to be exclusive in a city with so many people and temptations and that one has to watch out for 'players'. They are everywhere, and China is no exeption. (Next time I will wear high heels so I can reach for the cereals by myself!).
-------- Where: Airport (on my way to Shanghai)
Who: The business guy who was sick of life
This guy I met even before I got here. I love airports just because of that special feeling you get there. Its a feeling of excitement of going somewhere new but yet with a tab bit of bitterness because you are leaving something behind, and stress of course because all the people rushing in different directions! So there I was stranded in Copenhagen. My flight to Shanghai was cancelled, because a typhoon had hit main land. I was all alone with too much luggage. I wasn't even supposed to be in Europe anymore! Feeling tired, hot, annoyed and just generally in a bad mood I qued to service centre to get my hotel voucher when I all of a sudden spotted Him. Tall, dark hair, nice style in clothing and radiant with confidence, just a gorgeous stranger. He was clearly a business man but with a cool leisure touch. WOW! He was unfortunately first in line and disappeared. I did miraculously catch up with him and the rest is like a sweet Hollywood movie.
"So you are stranded as well?" he asked when we are waiting for our bags. "YES! DUH! Why else would I be here ?!" I thought. But of course I didn't say so. I just smiled and said "Yeah" casually. He then suggested we should share a cab and conversation flew. It felt like I knew him already. He then asked me for out for dinner. We ended up talking for non stop for 8 hours, having a nice dinner, hitting some bars and walking the streets and alles of Copenhagen. The next day we were upgraded and flew business class to Shanghai talking and laughing the whole flight. Things were running so smooth. I made plans in my head of how we would explore Shanghai together, walk hand in hand and check out the markets, take an evening river cruise and try new restaurants. Yes, I admit I can get carried away somtimes, I know. When we finally touched down in Shanghai we exchanged numbers but he then casually said "?m not sure when I will call since I'm off to Tibet to do some soul searching for 8 weeks after signing a contract here."
Lesson learned:
There are no rules, no guarantees, nothing is for sure in a busy business oriented town like Shanghai. The guy you date may say "we can't meet this weekend because I have a job interview in Hong Kong, or I won't call for a while I'm going skiing in Nagano". People are constantly on the move. Shanghai is like one big airport and everyone is in transit. You just have to learn to enjoy t h e moment because there might not always be a second one. Where: Boring dinner party
Who: The guy I want
A friend of a friend invited me to join a dinner party. I had no idea everyone would be almost twice my age. I was stuck in the middle of conversations of how hard it is to find a good wedding planner, a trustworthy ayi and which international schools is best for your young children. When you are 19 this is all very hard to relate to. I guess I must have looked really bored because the only guy under 30 across the table kept on smiling and looking at me. He has gorgeous, intense brown eyes which intrigued me. After dessert he came over and asked "Do you like Hip hop"? and my answer was of course "Yes, I do". So we left and went dancing. We swapped numbers and have been dating for weeks. He is down to earth, easy going and totally relaxed, smart and charming and lives here (just like me!). We do simple things; watch a movies, cook, go running, meet for a cup of coffee or some wine. He is just himself and I'm simply me and that's all it takes.
Lesson learned: It is just like everyone says, you meet someone when you don't expect it. There ARE nice interesting guys out there. Its just hard work to find them but its inspiring to know they exist. Keep looking...
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That's all for now. Its a jungle out there. A girl has to watch out because there are a lot of bad guys around who don't have you best interest in mind, who thinks that dinners, money and free trips will get them what they want. But the above piece of research is also states that there is hope to find a new guy who cares, makes you laugh, will send you an sms to check how your day has been and thinks you are beautiful without make up... If that is what you want. If you are into dating then there is variety and choice in a fun big city like Shanghai. If you are up for meeting lots of new different guys, dress up, be street-smart and enjoy it. But always rememeber that a boyfriend should not'mak' or define your life but enrich it. 要么说德语要么说中文，拜托 这么长的英语
看着懂我也没性子往里看呀 原帖由 asiafalcon 于 2006-2-25 04:07 发表
要么说德语要么说中文，拜托
$不错$$不错$
这里是德国热线，尔不是英语热线！:lol::lol: 第一个一看职业就想起了 catchhme if you can, 再一读故事, 果然花啊~~~~ 以前，只要出去玩，看到这样的事儿的机会就不少不了。
那个飞行员真是够典型的。 原帖由 anise 于 2006-2-25 10:12 发表
$不错$$不错$
这里是德国热线，尔不是英语热线！:lol::lol:
$鼓励$$鼓励$$鼓励$$欢迎$ 不想看英文，对不起。 我没这各时间把它翻译过来。 宽且也是很易懂的英文。 眼晕。。。。
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