Good News and Bad News

tommy-chen

:D 看到一个笑话,让大家也乐乐
, T8 s$ G6 m$ w% z$ l+ s: u! qThe soldiers had been marching and fighting,they were very dirty ,hot and tired.
One day,the General announced:"My men,I have some good news and some bad news for you
" |6 n/ A  M# o9 s2 t& u- dwhich one would you like first?" "the good news!" they all shouted. "OK." said the General "the good
8 I! t7 J  n) t$ |news is that you will  each be receiving a complete change of clouthing"
"Hurrah!"chorused the soldiers."and now for the bad news,Jack,you will change with John.John,you will change
4 ^8 A6 k: O4 h! I# Z  {5 j4 ^! Twith Tom.Tom,you will change with***.and *** will change with .......

goldfish

A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed.
# k; b6 w# B( \5 X
After years of this the wife wants him to quit, so she gets two shot glasses, fills one with water the other with whiskey.
/ q4 S6 {+ u! p' Z- q9 Q& C
She gets him to the table with the glasses and has his bait box there too.
+ Z# S/ f+ Z3 M5 Q; ~) N. XShe says "I want you to see this."
She puts a worm in the water it swims around.
# K5 m  L& v1 v* dShe puts a worm in the whiskey and the worm dies.

Sternly the wife remarks, "So what do you have to say about this experiment?"

Cooly the husband replies, "If I drink whiskey, I won't get worms!"

tommy-chen

我也刚看到一个,顶楼上!!

ohye$ok$ ,再来一个
一位来自日本的旅客，坐出租车去机场的路上，看到一辆汽车经过，就说：“oh，TOYOTA！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”又有一辆经过，他又说： “oh，NISSAN！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”司机有点不高兴，觉得他太吵了！当第三辆经过时，他还是说：“oh，HONDA！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”
0 h7 n! j+ {+ E6 @( v
后来到了机场，那个日本人就问：“How Much？”出租车司机说：“1000！”
# R, N( Z4 L6 k9 E2 B& Z2 x5 o
/ j8 n7 h5 ^! Z. P1 W1 g日本人惊奇的问司机：“为什么那么贵？”出租车司机回答说：“oh，mileometer（计 程表）！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”
:D :D :D

tommy-chen

中国建设银行——CBC (Construction Bank of China) ——“存不存？”
. f' Q9 T% B; M1 m中国银行　　——BC （Bank of China）——“不存。”
) u$ s+ f  X: R, ^6 ?( z中国农业银行——ABC (Agriculture Bank of China)— —“啊，不存”
9 B4 @8 ~! w% V+ H3 @中国工商银行——ICBC (Industry and Commercial Ba nk of China)——“爱存不存”
招商银行　　——CMBC——“存吗？？白痴！”
兴业银行　　——CIB——“存一百”
) |. \6 g3 ?" i( d3 q4 [/ V北京市商业银行——BCCB (Beijing City Commercial B ank)——白存存不？”
汇丰银行　　——（HSBC）还是不存”